/mlp/ greentext » Change of Pace

punki, 2017-09-26—2020-02-28

Part 1

2017-09-26 – Desuarchive, PonePaste

>You are Paradise Skies, the pegasus, and today is really going to suck.
>In fact, it's going to do more than suck.
>It's going to really fucking suck.
>You wish that you could just stay in bed all day today, and just have everything blow over, but you know that you're just prolonging the inevitable.
>You turned 18 last month, and instead of having a big birthday celebration with your friends, drinking, partying, visiting Manehattan, or some other big city for its nightlife, you did something different.
>You sat alone, and ate mac and cheese in your room while browsing 4pone.
>Same thing that you would any other night of the week, only this time with slightly more crying.
>Ever since being a filly, you were always the more quiet and reserved type, but ever since those portals to Earth opened up when you were 13 or so, the newfound technology that the humans brought with them in the now-dubbed "Technological Revolution" made it even easier to slip away from the social pressures of day-to-day life.
>Humans brought many great things to your world, but you have to say, hands down, your favourite thing of all is the internet.
>Your precious safety barrier of glass, plastic, and light that separates you from the outside world.
>Sounds great, right? Wrong. Oh, so very, very, very wrong.
>The past week has been absolute Hell, and you're about to have your entire way of life flipped upside down.
>You roll over onto your side with an "umph," and slide out of bed, landing on all four hooves.
>Holy fuck, you feel like shit.
>No rest for the wicked anyway, you may as well hop in the shower and get ready for your "big day."
>*Hoo-frickin-ray~
>From the moment that your door opens, and you begin to walk along the hallway, your mother's voice calls out from downstairs.
>"Paradise! Get your bags ready, I'll cook breakfast and then we'll have to get going."
>You say nothing as you walk to the bathroom, and nudge the door open with your nose.
>You tremble a little at the thought of what today is going to be like.
>It'll be okay Paradise, just remember to breathe. Just breathe and it'll all go away. It'll pass.
>As you shakily turn on the water faucet for your shower, you leap back with a little "yelp!" as the cold water hits your shoulders, causing you to hyperventilate a little in the corner of your bathroom.
"Holy *pant* shit.. *pant*.."
>While you wait for the water to warm up a little, you pick yourself up from the ground and shakily trot over to the sink.
>You begin your wobbly act of clambering up onto your hind legs to brush your teeth before catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.
>Yikes. That's some spooky stuff. You actually made yourself jump a little.
>Staring back at you, you see a young mare with big enough bags under her tired looking brown eyes to kill lesser beings, and a messy beige coat, and unkempt messy brown mane and tail to match.
>You look even shittier than usual today, fucking Hell.
>You sensibly decide to resign yourself to picking up your toothbrush between your teeth and carrying it into the shower with you so you don't have to look at how much of a mess you are in the mirror.
>The last thing you really need right now is to destroy what little confidence you may or may not have left.
"Ahhh.."
>The shower has always relaxed you.
>You flutter out your wings and begin to wash yourself from head to toe as the warm water washes over you, awakening each part of your body in succession.
>Feelsgoodman.jpg
>Just because you don't get out too often doesn't mean you wanna smell like an unwashed jockstrap.
>While standing with the water running over your fur and mane, you can't help but unwind as your mind begins to wander just a tad.
>This nonsense all started about three or four weeks ago. It was a couple of days after your birthday, actually.
>Your mom had approached you, and told you in no uncertain terms that you A) Either had to get a job, or go to college, or B) Move out of the house within a month.
>She just doesn't get it. It's not that simple.
>With you having the issues that you have, you can't exactly hold down a job, and colleges would be a major no-go area considering how well you handle that whole anxiety attack thing.
>So, you being the idiot you are, you called her bluff.
>She tried this same stunt when you were 16, and she made no big deal of it that time around, so it'd be the same this time, right?
>Ding, ding, ding! You're a winn- Oh wait, no you weren't, because that whole thing backfired on you really fucking catastrophically.
>Last week, your mom handed you a flier for a university in some Earth city called Reids.. Or Leeds.. Or something like that?
>Ever since the portals opened, both humans and ponies alike decided that the best possible way to integrate into one anothers societies would be to educate the youth on both ends, as "we are the future!" Or some silly shit.
>Yup, seriously. Sending a bunch of normies to high end universities and colleges (all pre-paid for, might you add) to have sex with each other, do drugs, cast black magic, and generally just act like morons is *just* what we need moving forward together as two species.
>Either way, you're going to be heading there, and your initial enrollment day is one week from now, and you're absolutely shitting yourself.
>You're going to be doing an "Equestrian Introduction to Earth" course, and an Equestrian-Specific computing course, which is sort of cool you guess.
>Hopefully it's not too ba-
>"Paradise!"
"Uh.. Huh?"
>You glance over to your watch that is laying on the sink beside the shower, only to notice that you've been stood in here for half an hour thinking about random shit while idly washing yourself and scrubbing your nibblers.
"AH! Shit! Sorry mom! I'll not be long!"
>Despite the fact that you don't really want to go anywhere, you can't really purposely try to delay this any longer.
>Just think of it as ripping off a bandaid.
>A year long bandaid.
>With a quick scrub of your mane, tail, teeth, and butt, you're looking (and smelling) a million times better than you did when you originally woke up, so hey! That's something, you guess?
>You've seriously reached the point where just getting out of bed and taking a shower is an achievement to you, Celestia help you.
>You quickly run to your room after halfassedly trying to dry your mane and coat in a mix of scrubbing with a towel, and shaking yourself dry like one of those cute internet doggos.
>Maybe you could get a doggo of your own on Earth, that'd be nice.
>Then again, you'd have to walk it, and ehhhh... Outside.. Nope. Not quite ready for that yet you don't reckon. Let's see how traumatic university is first.
>As you charge through your door, you expertly slide along the floor on your belly, and into your baggy oversized deep crimson hoodie that you have appropriately dubbed the safety shield.
>Goddamn, it's so cosy.
>You take one final look around your room as you pick up your glasses off of the bedside table, and head for the door.
>You're going to miss this place, but you know that you have no say in the matter anymore.
>The time has come.

Part 2

2020-02-28 – Desuarchive, PonePaste

>You are Anon, and today has been a serious drag at uni. You've been working on this crap for 3 years and you've had enough of it.
>You're sick of your cunt professor and his stupid haircut, and you're sick of dealing with the pajeets in your comp-sci class trying to tell you that Java is the greatest programming language in the known universe.
>Ah well, at least it's clock-off time. Time to get the fuck outta' dodge.
>As you get up from your chair, you grab that big gift-wrapped box of yours from under your desk before you head out, and so begins your short trip back to the student neighbourhood that resides a kick up the ass away from campus.
>Your landlord is a slimy bastard who's rates are pure daylight robbery, but the whole area is populated entirely by students so it beats the shit outta' living in the town centre. That place is a proper dump.
>Ah yes, being stabbed to death by some smack-head on your way home for your 8 year old Blackberry phone that has the rubber peeling off of it. Ah, yes.. Very nice.
>That said, mind you. Not everything is shit. Your housemate is pretty alright, and the area you live in (despite the bloody cost) is pretty nice too, all things considered.
>Speaking of your housemate, she comes from some "backwater shithole" (as she puts it) on Equestria, but you'd honestly think that she grew up on Earth with how she speaks. She's a little shaky and soft in the voice, but she sounds as human as you do.
>You initially just drew straws and got bunked with her by pure chance a few years back when she first got here in 2017, and you immediately knew that she was a bit.. Different.
>The main thing that gave it away was just how terrified she was when she first walked into that tiny dorm you two had at the time and got the fright of her life when you initially introduced yourself.
>God, you miss that place. It was a small and cramped, but it was free. First years got all the good shit back then because of the cross-worlds immigration program.
>Umad2020zoomers? No free housing for you.
>You remember it like it was yesterday, actually.

>You are Paradise Skies, the year is 2017, and you are currently shitting enough bricks to build an entire 6 bedroom house with a swimming pool and three detached garages.
>You somehow managed to find your way to the dorm building at your new university after a taxi ride from border-control with the help of your phone, sheer luck, and a 12-hour-long panic attack that had you stuttering to just about everyone you bumped into.
>Okay, maybe that last one wasn't the biggest help in the world, but it did seem to signal to that one chick who was working on the reception desk that you needed help in being shown to the part of campus where your room is, so you're gunna' count it. It just werked.
>To cut it short; The trip here has put your anxiety through the roof, scared the life out of you, and you're just sick, tired, and want to go to sleep, which is exactly what you're going to do as soon as you find your room.
>Walking along the dimly lit wood-trimming lined corridors, you see practically nobody around as your hooves make a light click-clack on the shiny oak floors.
>If it's as quiet as this 24/7, living here might not be the worst thing in the world. This place is a ghost-town.
>Slowly making your way along, you stop to check that piece of paper you were given and drop your heavy bags onto the floor to give your back a rest.
>Dorm number 371.
>Walking along, you have to flutter up slightly to get a look up at the tops of the big old doors to see where they're marked with shiny brass plaques with the room numbers stamped onto them. Good thing that you can fly, this place isn't exactly earth-pony friendly.
>368, 369, 370, ah, there we go. 371. Home sweet home.
>You turn the handle on your door with your hoof and immediately turn around to grab your bags from the floor, nudging the the door open with your back leg as back your way into the room, slowly dragging your stuff in your mouth with great difficulty.
>Fucking bags, carrying them up here has been a nightmare and a ha-
????: "Oh, sup? You're Paradise, right?"
Paradise: "A-a..A..Mrph?!"
>W-what th-th.. T-that came from your room..
>You slowly turn your head towards the source of the sound to look into the room and see who just spoke to you.
>Immediately, like a deer caught in the headlights, you freeze in fear. You weren't exactly expecting someone to be here.
>Your mom told you that the school were told that you don't exactly do well with other people around, t-there must be some mistake..
>Sitting at a desk in your room, a messy haired human guy on a laptop looks over his shoulder at you and tilts back on his chair before getting up.
????: "You alright there? I'm Anon, your roommate. Lemme give you a hand with this shit, I feel your pain pal. I dragged my shit up here when the lifts were out of order the other day."
>Roommate? You never knew you'd be living with a stranger.
>Shitshitshitshit.. Oh no.. Nonono.. Your chest feels weirdly tight.
>Not now, please..
Paradise: "A-I.. I a-am y-yeah.." (you manage to stutter out)
>As Anon approaches, he towers over you and reaches down for your bags, leaning over you.
>Your heart is beating in your chest like a steam-train going at full tilt, your legs shake like they're made of jelly, and you recoil into yourself as you clamp your eyes closed with a whimper.
Anon: "Don't worry, not gonna drop em on you or anything."
Paradise: "N-n.. *sigh*, No.. I-I know.. I'm just a little tired.. S-sorry.."
Anon: "Yeah, I bet man. Long trip, eh? I've been to Australia once and Canada twice, but after one trip to Equestria.. good God. Jet lag ain't got shit on teleportation-lag or whatever it is. Leaves you feeling like death don't it?"
>After grabbing some of your stuff and leaving you with one of your bags, he heads over to the back of the room and clicks down the switch on his little desk-kettle as he walks past, causing the water to start bubbling away almost immediately.
Anon: "Coffee. Dirty habit, I know. Want one?"
>You just slightly shake your head and manage to get out a "N-no thank you."
>He plops your stuff down on a bed on the right side of the room while you stand frozen on the spot in the doorway with your heart in your throat and jelly in your legs.
Anon: "Hope you don't mind this one.. Y'can come in you know? Your room too."
Paradise: "R-right.. I-I know.."
>You slowly walk your way into the room and over to where Anon put your things and climb up onto your bed and sit down.
Anon: "So, bathroom is the door over there, ironing board is kept in the cupboard over there, the closet of a kitchen is over there, and the drawer and wardrobe space is split 50/50. Bed you're sitting on is all yours. I left the bottom drawers for you because I figured with the whole pony thing it might be a bit easier for ya, but if you want a higher one then lemme know. Feel free to use any of my stuff that you want."
Paradise: "Th-thanks.. S-sorry if I stutt.. *sigh*.. Sorry if I stutter at all.. Th-thats what I was trying to say."
Anon: "Don't even trip, I get it. Anxiety thing, right?"
Paradise: "I.. Y-yeah.. How did you know?"
Anon: "New place, new people, slightly cramped room with a big scary monkey-man living with you. Shit, I'd be bricking it too. I'm terrified of horses, I hear they can kill you with a single kick."
>He gives you the I'm watching you hand gesture.
>You manage to giggle a little at how blunt he is.
Anon: "I'm sure you wouldn't do that though, eh? I'm useful at getting stuff off of the top shelf, I swear. What're you studying anyways? Comp-sci or something, right?"
Paradise: "H-heh.. I- I guess not.. And yeah, I am.. Comp-sci plus a computing for ponies course. Y-you?
Anon: "Comp-sci here as well. Looks like you'll have to be guarding your coursework with your life, because trust me friend, I ain't too proud to plagiarise."
Paradise: "M-maybe, maybe we have courses together?"
Anon: "Yeah, maybe.. You got your rotor yet? Pass it over here, let's have a look."
>[Some time passes ...]
>As you shoot the shit with Anon for a few more hours, your heart rate steadily calms down and your legs stop shaking as much.
>From what you've learned, Anon and you actually share several classes. Looks like you'll be spending a fair bit of time together while you're here.
>You've not really had much chance to speak to anyone in person barring your mom over the last couple of years, so it's been nice speaking to someone different. You tell Anon a little about yourself, and he does the same with you.
>You share a lot in common, actually. Same courses, he browses 4chan (the website that apparently inspired 4pone), and he even shares some similar life experiences while growing up too, actually.
>He tells you that he was pretty shy and socially awkward as a kid too, which makes you feel a bit better.
>The real cream of the crop though is the fact that he also likes videogames, and apparently had a Sega Dreamcast *and* a PS2 while growing up which you are SUPER jelly of. You've wanted one of those ever since watching videos about them online. Old Earth videogames are way cooler looking than the new ones.
>When you get some money behind you, you'd love to buy a PS2. Maybe one day.
>Man, you're getting sleepy..
>Sometime over the course of chatting to Anon while he works away on his laptop, you crash out and fall asleep on your bed.
>You fall asleep thinking to yourself that life here might actually be not so bad after-all.
>He seems nice.

>Thinking of that day still makes you smile for some reason, you're proud of her for how far she's come.
>She's put in so much effort, and she's not missed a single class these last two years because of her anxiety.
>Still a bag of nerves sometimes, and you can see that on her face occasionally, but she's been making a whole lot of effort to move forward and you're happy to support her every step of the way.
>It's what friends are for, right?
>Speaking of moving forward, tonight is a big deal for her too.
>Today's her birthday, and she doesn't particularly *do* birthdays all that well given that she doesn't really hang out with anyone barring you.
>You're one to talk though. You don't really bother with anyone either barring one or two of your friends from your classes. You just don't have the time for it anymore.
>Doesn't bother you though. You've got your NEET-in-recovery pal, and that'll do for you.
>She's told you how shit her 18th was, but you're aiming to make up for that this year, as you didn't even know her back then to ensure that it wasn't a total train-wreck.
>This birthday is a bit more special than her 18th anyways being that it's her 21st. Bit of a milestone, that one.
>You asked her the other day what she wanted to do for her big day, and she just told you that she wants to spend the night playing videogames with you, so that's just what you're gonna do.
>Not just any videogames though, oh no..
>She told you not to get her anything, but you couldn't help yourself. She grew up in a world without the PS2, and you know how badly she's wanted one of those since moving here.
>Hopefully she likes the pure kino that is SSX Tricky and GTA San Andreas, because that's what you've got her to go with her console.
>You head up your street and kick a can along the cold frosty pavement in front of you before booting it as hard as you can into the bushes before taking a turn down the path to your small house.
>Fiddling with your keys in one hand, while holding the ridiculously oversized box in the other, you manage to wiggle them into the lock and get your front door open and are welcomed by the smell of takeout food and loud house music.
>Absolutely based. Her taste in music is like something out of the 90's, it's great.
Anon: "Hey Paradise, I'm home, where you at?"
>The hurried scatter of hooves can immediately be heard in the living room to your left.
>She pokes her head out from around the corner with a big smile on her face.
Paradise: "Anon! I got us dinner!"
>You mockingly wave your hands in the air like some pretentious food critic or a fancy chef.
Anon: "Don't tell me.. Stirfry.. Mm.. Egg fr- No.. Mushroom fried rice, spring rolls, and fortune cookies?"
Paradise: "H-how do you do that?"
Anon: "It's totally magic, and not a single thing to do with the fact that I know you know me well enough to get me that sweet ass mushroom fried rice without even having to ask me what I want."
>All you get in response to that is a little smile and a hoof knock to the side of your leg.
>As you both walk and talk to the living room, she pipes up with a head tilt.
Paradise: "What's with the box anyways?"
Anon: "I think you know what's up with the box. Happy birthday Mrs. Idontwantyoutogetmeanything."
>As soon as you say this, she looks genuinely surprised and her ears immediately perk up before then going slightly flat again as she shrinks into herself a little.
Paradise: "W-what? R-really? W-why did you do th-that?"
Anon: "No, I just brought this big gift-wrapped box home with me for no particular reason whatsoever on your birthday for shits and giggles. Of course "really", you absolute melon. Open it up. It's your birthday and we're friends, that's why."
>She smiles with a slightly anxious look on her face before gently taking the box from your hands and nudging it across the floor in front of your couch before absolutely shredding the paper off of it like there's no tomorrow.
>She just instantly freezes as soon as she's done unwrapping it and stares at it on the floor.
>Uh oh.
Anon: "Para, you alright?"
>Paradise.exe has stopped responding.
Anon: "Beep boop, Eath to Paradise. You alright, space ranger?"
>Yeah, nope, she ain't alright. Better carry out a status report.
>You get up and crouch down next to her to make sure she's not blue-screening.
>Putting your hand on her shoulder, she jumps a little before turning her head towards you with slightly misty eyes, but she doesn't look sad. She just looks incredibly surprised.
>She's.. Crying?
Anon: "Shit, what's up? Wanna talk about it, champ? Is it because I didn't get you Super Monkey Ball?"
>She sniffles and giggles at you.
Paradise: "N-no you t-tard.. *sniff*.. Th-this is the nicest thing anyone has ever gotten me before.."
Anon: "Nah man, it's nothing it's j-"
Paradise: "*sniff* A-Anon, it's not nothing, and i-it's not just anything."
>She wipes a few tears from her face using her sleeve and just looks at you with big shiny brown eyes and is absolutely beaming with joy under her emotional spill-over.
Paradise: "When I tell you that th-this is the nicest thing anyone has e-ever gotten me, I mean it. T-thank you.."
>It's rare for her to cut you off like that, she must mean business.
Anon: "It's cool, just wanted to get you something I know you've wanted forever. I know I don't really say it much, but you're my closest friend. I care about you."
Paradise: "D-do you really mean that?"
Anon: "Yeah man, of course. Shit, I'd not be here if I didn't."
>No sooner than you can get the words out, she sits herself on your lap into your crossed legs and reaches her front legs around you in a massive hug.
>As you sit there, you return the embrace with a hand stroking her hair as she nuzzles herself into your chest.
Anon: "Looks like we're having an emotional nigga hours kinda night tonight then."
Paradise: "Mhm.. W-we are *sniff*"
>You shuffle your legs up and pick her up with one hand on her back, and one under her butt to support her.
Anon: "C'mon then, let's get to it."
>As you get to your feet with an "oof", she pulls her head out of your chest to look at you.
Anon: "Waddya say we go fucking demolish that Chinese food, and then I can kick your ass at SSX all night until you ragequit and threaten to strangle me to death with the controller cables?"
Paradise: "H-heh.. I-I would love that.. Anon"
>As you walk to the kitchen with her cradled in your arms, you feel her shuffle and snuggle in closer to you as she tightens her grip on you.
>You smile to yourself as you think; Life could definitely be worse.